the state of being happy.”she struggled to find happiness in her life”
synonyms:contentment, pleasure, contentedness, satisfaction, cheerfulness, cheeriness, merriment, merriness, gaiety, joy, joyfulness, joyousness, joviality, jollity, jolliness, glee, blitheness, carefreeness, gladness, delight, good spirits, high spirits, light-heartedness, good cheer, well-being, enjoyment, felicity;
Hi it’s Dermot again. If you read my last blog, you will know that this is a follow up to that blog and part of a “Recovery from Addiction Series“, If not read on:
PURSUIT OF HAPPINESS
TIPS ON HOW TO FULFILL YOUR LIFE IN RECOVERY
When I was in active addiction, I didn’t know how I felt. I was numb to emotion. I thought I was happy when 6pm came and I finished work and went on the drink. That’s all I looked forward to all day. I was living in a bubble and I suppose that is all I knew. Stepping out of the box and into the reality of recovery, I see & mostly feel, just how miserable my existance, Not life, was. I was far from happy or even content, in fact it is those memories, especially of my last 2 years of drinking that re enforced my desire to stay sober. It is then, that I was in a position to start to find true happiness.
What is Happiness to Me?
- How do I measure my own happiness?
- How do I know if I am genuinely happy?
- Can happiness be learned or grow (fake it to make it)?
- Will my happiness affect others?
- Is happiness contagious?
How can I be happy?
- Happiness comes from within.
- Challenge negative thoughts and feelings and replace them with positive ones
- Life skill.
- Focus on the here and now as much as you can.
- Learn & Practice Transcendental Meditation, Mindfulness or Yoga.
- Let go of other peoples’ negative opinions about yourself.
- Let go of your own negative opinions about yourself
What do I need to do to stay happy?
- Happiness is a positive emotion and also behaviour which is contagious and will replace negative emotions and behaviour.
- Do what makes you happy and avoid what makes you sad.
- Keep doing what you are doing and don’t stop once you have achieved a feeling of happiness and contentment.
Live in the present moment.
- How do I deal with adverse life situations and people & stay happy?
- Live and accept life and don’t avoid or hide from it.
- Always remind yourself “This too shall pass”
- All emotions both negative and positive are beneficial to our growth as people in recovery and need to be felt and not avoided.
- Don’t make any big decisions when in a low mood, wait until you mood gets better.
- Avoid overly negative people & pray for them.
How do I deal with my own negative emotions to make them more positive?
- Do not over analyze your negative thoughts, as that’s all they are: thoughts, nothing else.
- You can’t monitor all your thoughts, but you can stop them once they start to become overbearing: i.e. sensitivity, paranoia.
- Use your own emotions as a barometer to your own thinking.
- Check the facts before you make a judgement.
- Avoid isolating and become part of AA or another fellowship group and TALK.
What does it mean to be in Being?
- Recovery is not a one off experience/ situation.
- Recovery is a lifestyle change.
- Recovery HAS to evolve into a major part of our own daily routine or habit.
- When in a state of being you are in a state of acceptance and not resistance.
- Although life around you will probably be the same, you will feel an inner peace and not harbour resentments, anxieties, fears and other character defects.
- Happiness is an emotion that can be learned and worked towards.
- Keep a check on your emotions.
- Let go of negativity, by focusing on the positive opposite.
- Check the facts before you make judgements and assumptions.
- Live life one day at a time, not in the past or future.
- Accept recovery not as a burden but as a gift.
My Next Blog is Getting the Positive, from the Negative
The articles in “Recovery from Addiction” Series, are the opinion of the author and if you would like to contribute to it, please leave a comment in the comment box below. If you want to subscribe, for free, to any further blogs of mine please leave your email in the blue box below.
Recovery is about growth and everyone does grow at a different pace. My advice to anyone in early recovery is to wait at least 2 years before making any major life changing decisions that might have emotional ramifications. An example: get a mortgage, get married, change career, emigrate. In light of this everyone has dreams and we all do want to better our lives in one way or another, so it is important in early recovery to start to put those dreams into reality by creating achievable goals which can be reached in time. I found in my early recovery, although I had dreams, I wasn’t aware of creating goals and my life unfolded by default. It turned out well for me, but had I had clear goals, I do feel that it would have been even better.
I do try to learn from my mistakes, and that is why they are little miracles in themselves that happen for a reason. I am a growth seeking being I will continue to seek change in myself. What motivates me is the Pain – Pleasure, which moves me away from my pain points (a lack of finances, time & peace of mind) to my pleasure points (freedom of finances, time & peace of mind). The way I have found to achieve this freedom and to move away from the “Groundhog Day” of life is through on line marketing. I have taken this step into the abyss, I’m not tech savvy at all, and with the support of SFM, I am working my way through it. The internet is here to stay and is the future for all of us, so don’t get left behind because it is gaining momentum. If you want to learn what I am learning and are in a point in your life where you want change, then I offer you, through my mentors, a no obligation FREE 7 day video series to watch.